Bila tak tahu nak rasa apa.


Assalamualaikum dan hai.

Tak tahu lah. Actually dah banyak kali rasa gini. Sedih tapi boleh ketawa juga. Murung tapi tetap senyum. Cakap tabah banyak kali tapi tetap rasa nak nangis. Entah. Mungkin sebab diri ini sudah jauh dari Allah tulah hati selalu ndak tenang. Tulah nak handle some undescribable situation pun tak boleh :"(

Ya Allah apalah nak jadi dengan diri ni.

Sometimes, i just need a friend to listen. Who is willing to lend me some time just to be there. Who will know what words to say to make me feel better. Sebab bak kata smeone kat twitter, "kau pendampun, lama lama kan meletup jg". Yup. Shes right. And maybe im about to explode. Ats. Naah. Im not that pathetic lol.

And i dont know whats happening w my bestfriend. We tend to not talk to each other. It hurts. I mean, i do miss her. But dont know why i didnt text her, ws, wechat, or anything to her lately. I dont know what to say anymore. Bcs, she wouldnt mind either if i do or not :( Last night, i dreamt about her. Like we were having a fun time ever. But then i realised, it was just a dream. Alaaa. I tot it was real.

Why? Why cant we be as we used to? And we wouldnt be like this.

I dont know about you but im all mixed up right now. And i know you needed space. Bcs im not the only one who has issues. I know that you have a hard time too. Thats why im getting myself aware of that. Im sorry i cant do anything. But ill always be there. IF you need me lah.

Theres no need to be silent. Just say what you want to say to me. Confession or anything. Bcs, i can take it. Ill listen. Sometimes i just know youre hiding someting too. And im sorry i havent told you mine. I just didnt know how to start. I trust you from the beginning until this very day. Im just scared if you lose your trust on me :(



Well, what ever it is, or what ever heartbreak this is,

Im not giving up on you. Janji.
On rainy days,
                                                                        Iyan

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